Hot Air Balloon
A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted,
"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The woman below replied,
"You are in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude.
"You must be a safety officer (Gladys)," said the balloonist.
"I am," replied the woman, "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."
The woman below responded,
"You must be a manager for southern rail."
"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," said the woman,
"You don't know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."
or
Two women are on a transcontinental balloon voyage. Their craft is engulfed in fog, their compass gone awry. Afraid of landing in the ocean, they drift for days. Suddenly, the clouds part to show a sunlit meadow below. As they descend, they see a man walking his dog.
One of the flyers yells to the figure far below, “Where are we?”
The man yells back, “About a half mile from town.”
Once again, the balloonists are engulfed in the mist. One flyer says to the other, “He must have been a Safety Manager.”
The other says, “A Safety Manager! How do you know that?”
The first says, “That’s easy. The information he gave us was accurate, concise, and entirely irrelevant.”
Copyright safetyphoto 2006